What to Do in Bruges
September 7th 2008 04:49
Bruges
You don’t have to do much in Bruges. The town itself is the reason to visit. It just has to exist and you just have to make it there. But if you aren’t an etre kind of person and you need an activity to do then here's a few options. This isn’t so much a You Must Do This In Bruges list as a If You Need Some Shits and Giggles or You Have the Restlessness Of a Five Year Old And Your Girlfriend’s Having a Nap at the Hotel and You Need to Kill Some Time Then This Will Occupy Your Time List. So try:
1. Walking from the train station (Stations-Plein) to the central square (the Grote Markt).
It’s not that far but because of the winding medieval streets and the propensity of most major mapping companies to leave off smaller laneways that look temptingly like carriageways you should divert down, the sub-intelligent barely able to breath unassisted morons who compete on the Amazing Race can get from Dehli to San Francisco quicker than I can walk the kilometre from the station to the square.
2. Onze Lieve Vrouwekerk
On Mariastr. is a church with that awe inspiring standard of Fuck You We’re the Church architecture predominant in the days when Christianity was the Gordon Gekko of economy, religion, and gubernatorial politics. Also, it has Madonna and Child the one that isn't Guy Richies. It's one of the few and perhaps only of Michelangelo’s work outside Italy.
3. Catch a Shark in a Canal
It looks filthy in those canals and its not really classic shark habitat, but if you could catch a shark in there and prove it to me with a photo, it would settle a bet.
4. Frites met Bier
It’s not unique to Bruges but everyday spent in Belgium or Flanders more specifically should involve some eye wateringly strong beer and chips lathered with mayonnaise. De Halve Mann is recommended.
5. Hieronymous Bosch paintings
There are a few Bosch paintings in the Groeninge Museum. You don’t have to be a huge fan of his works but he’s a hometown hero and just to say you’ve been out looking at works by Hieronymous Bosch works sounds cool.
First rule of travel writing: don’t talk about travel writing. Second rule of travel writing: lists are in multiples of five. Top Five. Top Ten. If you’re a high end glossy: Top Twenty. But with all the maverickism (is that a word?) of McCain, cop this – a Top Six. And number six:
6. Sniff it
Don't apply the nose in a sad old man in a coat with nothing underneath siddling up to the young woman way, but give the olfactory senses a good work out in Bruges: it smells old. It smells like the middle ages. It’s probably the stagnant canals and mouldy brick work but it’s still quite an incredible thing.
Lucky Luke In Bruges
You don’t have to do much in Bruges. The town itself is the reason to visit. It just has to exist and you just have to make it there. But if you aren’t an etre kind of person and you need an activity to do then here's a few options. This isn’t so much a You Must Do This In Bruges list as a If You Need Some Shits and Giggles or You Have the Restlessness Of a Five Year Old And Your Girlfriend’s Having a Nap at the Hotel and You Need to Kill Some Time Then This Will Occupy Your Time List. So try:
1. Walking from the train station (Stations-Plein) to the central square (the Grote Markt).
It’s not that far but because of the winding medieval streets and the propensity of most major mapping companies to leave off smaller laneways that look temptingly like carriageways you should divert down, the sub-intelligent barely able to breath unassisted morons who compete on the Amazing Race can get from Dehli to San Francisco quicker than I can walk the kilometre from the station to the square.
Bruges
2. Onze Lieve Vrouwekerk
On Mariastr. is a church with that awe inspiring standard of Fuck You We’re the Church architecture predominant in the days when Christianity was the Gordon Gekko of economy, religion, and gubernatorial politics. Also, it has Madonna and Child the one that isn't Guy Richies. It's one of the few and perhaps only of Michelangelo’s work outside Italy.
3. Catch a Shark in a Canal
It looks filthy in those canals and its not really classic shark habitat, but if you could catch a shark in there and prove it to me with a photo, it would settle a bet.
4. Frites met Bier
It’s not unique to Bruges but everyday spent in Belgium or Flanders more specifically should involve some eye wateringly strong beer and chips lathered with mayonnaise. De Halve Mann is recommended.
5. Hieronymous Bosch paintings
There are a few Bosch paintings in the Groeninge Museum. You don’t have to be a huge fan of his works but he’s a hometown hero and just to say you’ve been out looking at works by Hieronymous Bosch works sounds cool.
First rule of travel writing: don’t talk about travel writing. Second rule of travel writing: lists are in multiples of five. Top Five. Top Ten. If you’re a high end glossy: Top Twenty. But with all the maverickism (is that a word?) of McCain, cop this – a Top Six. And number six:
6. Sniff it
Don't apply the nose in a sad old man in a coat with nothing underneath siddling up to the young woman way, but give the olfactory senses a good work out in Bruges: it smells old. It smells like the middle ages. It’s probably the stagnant canals and mouldy brick work but it’s still quite an incredible thing.
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