KL Bird Park
October 12th 2008 08:47
Every city needs a claim to fame. The biggest, the tallest, the smelliest. It is not important whether, objectively, it is something to be proud of. Whether its the biggest banana, the fattest resident, the heaviest operable tumor, municipalities seem ready to exclaim records no matter how lame sneering outsiders may deem it. The important thing is laying claim to a superlative and not whether it's worth to boasting about on its own merits. It is above all else a collective self esteem issue.
I grew up near the town of Tirau that had the biggest corrugated iron sheep in the world. To keep it under control they had to build the biggest corrugated iron sheep dog. The residents soon realised that sheep dogs are close to useless without proper instructions so they built a corrugated iron shephard to reign in the dog. The corrugated iron shephard is actually on church land and has that designer stubble and permed wavy hair thing going on that renaissance painters thought was an identikit of Christ (it was a much closer likeness of a 15th century Florentine women than a year dot jewish carpenter) but it's unclear whether it's a coincidence or some none too subtle church marketing. This is all irrelevant because I reckon either way he's the biggest corrugated iron shephard, the biggest corrugated iron Jesus, or the biggest corrugated iron Jesus dressed as a shephard in the world.
With the Petronas Towers, Kuala Lumpur had the tallest building in the world for almost a decade. Buildings. Plural. There were two of the monsters. Not to take away from Tirau's acheivements, but that's a genuine bona fide record. And then along came those Taiwanese misers with their Taipei 101 some 200 feet higher.
To the consolation of the KL residents they still have the world's largest free-flight walk-in aviary. It's not as prestigious when you have to qualify it like that, but a record's a record.
It's not a bad way to spend half a day. If you like birds. And I like. Birds.
Everything is in order: the Flamingos are pink and the pelicans are white. Perhaps the parrots aren't quite as adept at swearing as one would hope but they give some sass with enough taunting. The hornbills, described pretty much by their name, are one of the star attractions along with the hawks who, unfortunately despite their residence in the world's largest free-flight aviary, are cooped up in depressingly small cages and have to wear peaked hoods that make them look as if they've come from Abu Gharaib. And the Parrot Kiosk neither has parrot on the menu nor parrot waiters, which is misleading.
As you know, monkies aren't birds, but they roam the grounds as well, stealing bird food and playing with themselves in time honoured primate fashion.
And if passive birds being birdy aren't entertaining enough for you, then the bird show at the amphitheatre has lorokeets riding bicycles and doing maths which is worth the trip to KL alone.
If you had to choose, I'd imagine the average resident of Kuala Lumpur would prefer to stick with the Petronas Towers instead of downgrading to an open air aviary, but sometimes you have to play the cards you're dealt and a whole bunch of birds under netting is now KL's hand. As long as they don't build an oversized corrugated iron sheep dog.
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